Skip to main content

Five Things to Watch This Week - Week 1

The Patriots play their first game of the year at The Ralph against the Buffalo Bills of Western New York and the Greater Toronto Area on Sunday September 8th at 1:00 PM.

Another off-season is in the books.  Football is BACK!



I'm guessing this will be a bit of a down year for the Patriots.  Too much roster turnover on offense.  But, thankfully, for this team that means going 10 and 6.

The AFC East is just... bad.  Awful.  Rather terrible, even.  I don't see how they go less than 5 - 1 in the division.  Then it's just play .500 against the rest of the teams on the schedule.  Boom.  10 and 6.

I'm not even expecting good out of this defense.  I'd be happy with just average.


I have no idea who this is.
Nate Power Rankings:

1) Solder

2) Fisher 

3) Dogg  (What?  He's dead?  R.I.P., Nate Dogg)

4) Silver

5) the Great

6) Ebner

7) Robinson

The good news is we still have TB12.  And as long as you have Brady, you've got a chance.  But... Who is he throwing to?  And what do we know about them?  Does Tom even know their names yet?  How many nights did Tom cry himself to sleep when Welker signed with Denver?

Over / under on shots of Brady bitching out his receivers on the sideline this season:  131.5.

"What's your name again?  Great.  Don't ever run that route like that again or I'll have them cut you.  Now here... take a pair of Uggs."

Here's five new guys I'll be watching this week:

1) Danny Amendola - Could be a good fit with this team.  But even Julian Edelman thinks this guy is made of glass (Amendola has had ONE full 16 game season in his NFL career)

2) Josh Boyce - Was sneaky fast in the preseason.  Looks like he'll be the guy on the "have the WR run the ball" plays McDaniels loves to call.

3) Aaron Dobson - Oooh, he's 6' 3".  A tall wide receiver!  And he went to Marshall.  HE'll BE THE NEXT RANDY MOSS!

4) Zach Sudfeld - Had that one insane catch in the pre-season.  There is a very good chance I will inadvertently call him "Zach Sudafed" at some point this season.

5) Kenbrell Thompkins - Somebody has to catch passes from Brady.  Why not this guy?


Did Michael Hoomanawanui make the team again this year?

Yes!


My prediction: Pats 28, Bills 13

My prediction (Season): 10 - 6

*****

This year, we're going to have regular contributions from Fake Bill Belichick for your reading pleasure.  Here's this week's selection from Fake Bill Belichick's third book "My Life Away From Football":

Last year's loss in the AFC Championship game to the Ravens hit me pretty hard.  It took me three days to get out of bed.  Even if it seems like this stuff doesn't affect me... it does.

I sent text messages to Linda (ed. note: long time Belichick girlfriend Linda Holliday) and Josh (McDaniels, Patriots Offensive Coordinator)  saying I'd be done for a bit and not to worry about me. (I finally broke down and got a cell phone this year.  We'll see if I can figure it out.)  Then I just... wandered.  Like I did the year after I got canned in Cleveland. 

I put away the sweatshirt.  Didn't want anyone to recognize me.  Couldn't risk it.

And I went and did regular people stuff.  Went to the grocery store.  Ate out at restaurants.  Went to a concert or two.  Caught up with some shows on Netflix.  (Have you guys all seen "Breaking Bad"?  That's a quality program.  I especially like the guy that runs the restaurant with all the security cameras...)  Did some touristy stuff.  The beach.  You name it.  

I even tried selling real estate for a few days.  Didn't take.

But... I've got to be honest with you guys... It felt good to get away for a bit.  Cleared my head.

What did I learn while I was out on walk-about?  As much as I liked being a regular person for a bit, I eventually decided that, yes... I still loved the game and had a passion for this team.  I had to get back to football.  Gotta do what's best for the team.

I left McDaniels in charge of the roster during the offseason.  Anybody know who we drafted?  I should probably start learning the names of the new guys.

And who are playing this week?

Time to get the sweatshirt out of the closet.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Three Things to Watch This Week - Week 2

The New England Patriots play Tua Tagovailoa and the Miami Dolphins at Gillette Stadium on Sunday September 17th at 8:20 PM. Jabrill Peppers gave them a chance. Rough loss in week 1. Despite a horrific first quarter, they were in that game late. And they couldn't close it out. No moral victories. Bloom Power Rankings: 1) In 2) County 3) Bialystock and 4) Rachel 5) Orlando ... 11,997) Chaim Here are three things I wasn't particularly excited about last week: 1) The offense coming up small when the game was on the line. The defense gave them a chance. I'm seeing a pattern here. 2) The continued streak of being unable to win when the other team scores 25 points. 3) Giving away the ball. "We don't want it. You take it!" Did the Patriots score 20 points last week? Just barely. 2010s Jam of the Week The Joy Formidable - Whirring My prediction: Dolphins 34, Patriots 14 ***** This week we have Bill O'Brien, Reluctant Dungeon Master. Why is there so much text here?

Three Things to Watch This Week - Week 1

The New England Patriots play Jalen Hurts and the Philadelphia Eagles at Gillette Stadium on Sunday September 10th at 4:25 PM. With the Dolphins, Bills and even the (gulp)  Jets all trending upward, and the Patriots shopping for offensive linemen at the TJ Maxx close out rack, this could be a very  long season. In five short years, we've gone from "Can we just skip ahead to the AFC Championship Game already?" to "Boy, it sure would be swell to win a playoff game again someday!" Based on what I saw in the preseason, I think we're looking at an above average defense and a below average offense. This is maybe a   6 and 11 team.  I have no idea how I'm going to get through this year. I knew the post-Brady transition was going to be hard... But I just didn't think it would be managed this poorly. As such, we'll be slowly transitioning this little weekly fan newsletter into a support group.  Just a quick reminder of what last season looked like. Gene p

Three Things to Watch This Week - Week 5

The New England Patriots play Derek Carr and the New Orleans Saints at Gillette Stadium on Sunday October 8th at 1:00 PM. I'd like to thank the Patriots for letting me off the hook early this year. No messing around this time. They are  definitely   not  a playoff team. I'm done talking about Mac Jones. I have nothing nice to say about him. Please don't mention his name to me ever again. "He's good! He just needs better weapons around him!" /throws ball two yards short of wide open receiver Jean-Luc power rankings: 1) Godard 2) Picard If I had to talk myself into it, here are three things I'm feeling kinda sorta OK about this year so far: 1) Some of the rookies have been mostly good, especially Christian Gonzalez.  (And now he's hurt!) 2) Probably going to see a lot more Keion White with Judon going down. 3) Demario Douglas might be good. Just hang on to the football. Did the Patriots score 20 last week? My Brothers and Sisters of Our Lady of the Immac