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Five Things to Watch This Week - Week 14

The Patriots play their thirteenth game of the year at Gillette Stadium against the Cleveland Browns on Sunday, December 8th at 1:00 PM.


We gave up HOW MANY points to the Texans last week?


This is pretty much what I looked like getting up from the table on Thanksgiving.

These late comebacks are getting to be rough on my stress levels. I should just start watching these games in the second half.

Maybe this week they get a big lead early and put the Browns away for good. The Browns are starting (spins Quarterback Wheel of Doom) Jason Campbell at QB this week. Sure. Am I afraid of Jason Campbell? Not really. But I'll freely admit... Josh Gordon scares me more than a little.

Marcus Power Rankings:

1) Aurelius

2) Allen

3) Brody

4) Cannon

5) Neiman

Here the All Stars of the Patriots offense so far this season (other than TB12):
1) Rob Gronkowski - Even with missing the first 7 weeks, he's putting up great numbers (560 yards and 4 TDs in just 6 games). They're a much better team when he's on the field.

2) Shane Vereen - Vereen has emerged as the 3rd down back they've been looking for since Kevin Faulk retired. It's too bad he also missed half the season.

3) Julian Edelman - He's having a career year. He's blossomed in the Poor Man's Wes Welker role. I'm hoping they bring him back next year when his asking price goes up..

4) Stephen Gostkowski - Just a pair of 53 yard field goals in the 4th quarter last week. No big deal.

5) Aaron Dobson - Out of all the rookies WRs, I still think he's going to be THE GUY. Needs to get back on the field.


Did Michael Hoomanawanui have a catch last week?

No, silly. He's hurt.

Did Stevan Ridley fumble last week?

No!
Did James Develin score last week?

Yes!

My prediction: Pats 34, Browns 31

My prediction (Season): 12 - 4

*****
This week we have Fake Josh McDaniels filling for Fake Bill Belichick.

What up, Bros and Lady Bros?

Did we win again last week? Hells yes.

Did we put 34 points on the board again last week? Also hell yes.

BUT... it's not all tacos and brews in Josh's World this week, Bros. I had to have a little talk with one of our running backs.

"Hey... Stevan... Bro... Come on in. Have a seat."

"Hey Coach. What's up?"

"We need to talk... "

"Yeah, I figured this was coming."

"Everything OK at home?"

"Yeah. Things are great."

"Any other big changes? Anything you need to talk about? Any injuries you're hiding?"

"No. I feel great."

"Anyone on the team giving you a hard time?"

"No. I'm doing just fine. Fitting in. Making friends."

"OK... Then... How do we explain (long pause) the fumbling?"

"I'm scared, Coach."

"Scared of what?"

"The ball... If I hold onto too long... I'm afraid it'll catch on fire."

"What?"

"The ball. It's made of lava!"

"What?!"

"The football. If you hold it for more than 6 seconds, it gets hot. Super hot. And catches fire. Like that Mola Ram dude."



"Who told you that?"

"I... I shouldn't..."

"Tell me.  Now."

"Uh... I think it was Edelman."

"Edelman?"

"Yeah. Edelman."

(shakes fist at sky)

"EDELMAN!"

(thinks fast on his feet)

 "OK... What if we gave you some special super cool anti-lava gloves? They'll protect you if the football spontaneously catches fire. Do you think you could hold on to the football then?"

"You think it'll work, Coach?"

"I think we can try that. Hell, we've got to try something."
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