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Five Things to Watch This Week - Week 1 (Game 1)

The Patriots play their first regular season game at Joe Robbie Stadium Pro Player Park Pro Player Stadium  Dolphins Stadium Land Shark Stadium Sun Life Stadium against the Miami Dolphins on Monday, September 12th at 7:00 PM.

Just a reminder... The Dolphins could have had Drew Brees and chose Daunte Culpepper instead.

*** long pause ***

Bwah ha ha ha ha ha!

That story kills me.

I love 7:00 PM Monday Night Football.  All Monday night games should start this early (Suck it, West Coasties!).



(Albert approves of the earlier Monday night start time)


There's a whole bunch of new faces this year.  Let's start with the new guys.  Here's five things I'll be watching for this week:

1) Chad Ochocinco - I'll be honest with you... I'm not feeling great about what I've seen in the preseason so far.  He looked lost at times.  Could he end up thriving in this offense?  Maybe.  But I'm afraid this could be another Joey Gaolloway situation. 

2) Albert Haynesworth - Look, he's not likely to win any "great guy" awards.  But the Patriots got him on the cheap.  And Belichick excels at giving guys a chance to redeem themselves and turn their careers around (see: Moss, Randy). 

3) Shaun Ellis - I think we paid a little too much for a guy in his 12th year, but it's not my money.  Hopefully he's still got something left in the tank.

4) Andre Carter - He's looked great in preseason.  I'm really quite enamored by the revamped defensive line.  The third down defense should be greatly improved.

5) Mark Anderson - He's also looked great in preseason.  Hopefully he'll be a better, more consistent version of Tully Banta-Cain.



Other thoughts from around the league:

1) The Steelers looked like they hadn't even met each other before yesterday.  There's going to be a lot of that going around this year early on.  Not having an offseason will do that.  This problem should get better as the year goes on for most teams...

2) ...except for the Colts.  They're going to suck all year.  Schadenfreude-gasm!  The Colts have been in decline for a while.  Having the 2nd best QB of all time will cover up for a lot of drafting mistakes.  (Also, this:  Polian scouted Stanford QB Andrew Luck on Saturday)

3) I saw actual signs of life from the Washington Redskins yesterday.  Who knew?

4) I went to bed with the Cowboys comfortably ahead last night assuming the Patriots were already going to be half a game up this morning.  That's what I get for trusting Romo.  UPDATE:  This one is even better.


My prediction: Pats 28, Dolphins 17

*****

This year, we're going to have regular contributions from Fake Bill Belichick for your reading pleasure.  Here's this week's selection from Fake Bill Belichick's "Tales From a Life in Football":


It's 1975 and the Baltimore Colts are paying me $25 week.  (Springsteen's "Born to Run" had just come out.  Great album.)  I'm watching film.  Getting people coffee.  Picking people up at the airport.  You name it.  Whatever they need me to do.  I'm just a sponge at this point.  I'm trying to absorb everything I can.

One day, Coach Marchibroda pulls me into his office.  And he says to me, "Belichick!  You're here all the time.  You got a social life?  You got any lady friends?"

And I reply "Not right now, sir.  I'm trying to make a career for myself."

"Well, you're not going to impress the ladies coaching defense.  Broads like touchdowns."

"I'll take that under advisement, sir."

"Also, get you ass down to the liquor store.  Don't ever let me run out of vodka again."

Huge lush, Coach Marchibroda.

And we even made the playoffs that year.

True story.

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